Write and send New
Slop meter
Scores your draft for the habits that make writing sound machine-made. No AI involved.
What it is
I can spot AI writing in about two sentences now, and so can your readers. An em-dash here, a "Here's the thing" there, three fragments lined up for a drumbeat. Once someone notices, they stop reading, and a lot of them unsubscribe.
The slop meter reads your draft as you type and underlines the habits that make writing sound machine-made. It's 34 rules, written by hand after reading far too much of this stuff, and it runs entirely in your browser. There's no AI in it at all, which I still find funny.
01 Slop meter
A score while you write
The dial sits beside the page and moves as you type. Under 15 reads like a person wrote it. From 15 to 44 there's some slop in there, and 45 and up is heavy. Every fix moves the needle, so you can watch a draft get better.
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Underlines right in the text, so you see the problem where it is instead of in a report somewhere. Hover one and it tells you what it is and why it reads badly.
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A score from 0 to 100 that's fair to short notes, because it scores per hundred words, with a floor, so one dash in a two-line email doesn't max the dial.
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Quotes and code are left alone, so quoting someone else's breathless prose, or pasting a code sample, doesn't count against you.
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Your subject line is checked too, since that's the first thing anyone reads. It gets the phrase and punctuation rules.
02 Slop meter
A to-do list, worst first
Below the dial is a list of what to fix, one line per habit, sorted by how much each one costs you. Click the count and it jumps to the next one in your draft. Fixed items stay on the list with a tick, which is weirdly satisfying.
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Every flag comes with a plain fix, like "Delete it and say the sentence" or "Use a comma, parentheses, or start a new sentence." You learn the habits as you go, and after a few weeks you stop writing them.
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A progress line that remembers where you started, "Started at 62. Work the list to get under 15." It's a small thing and it makes the editing feel like progress.
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A clean-up prompt you can copy, listing the actual tells in this draft, if you'd rather hand the rewrite to your own AI tool. I won't judge. Much.
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One gentle nudge before you save a sloppy draft, "There is still slop in this draft. Save it as it is?" Keep writing, or save anyway. It asks once and never blocks you.
03 Slop meter
34 rules, in nine groups
The rules cover punctuation, lead-ins, framing tricks, mic drops, filler, model vocabulary, stock flourishes, structure, and rhythm. Each one has a weight: 1 means it's fine alone and only counts in numbers, 3 means nobody writes it by accident.
On top of those, three checks look at the whole piece: every sentence the same length, more bullets than prose, and the heading-bullets-repeat shape every chatbot answer seems to have.
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"It's not X, it's Y" and "Not just X, but Y", the framing tricks that knock down a claim nobody made. The rule tells you to say Y once.
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"Here's the thing", "Let's dive in", "Enter ETS.", announcements that a sentence is coming. Delete the announcement and say the sentence.
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Staccato runs and mic drops, "No fluff. No filler. Just results." and "Let that sink in." Join the fragments into one sentence that says something.
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Model vocabulary like delve, tapestry, and testament, words models use constantly and people almost never say out loud. Use the plain one.
Nothing leaves your browser
Scoring happens on the page, in your browser, while you type. Your draft isn't sent anywhere to be checked, and no model is asked what it thinks. The same rules run on the server for a couple of jobs, like warning you on the send page, and a test makes sure both give the same answer.
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No AI and no account needed to score, so it's instant, it's private, and it costs nothing to run as often as you like.
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A warning on the send page, never a block, "The writing check reads it as heavy slop. People who read slop turn it off." It's your newsletter. You decide.
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It also cleans up Kōlea's own AI, suggested subject lines with a tell are thrown out before you see them, and so are sloppy sentences in the reader council's notes.
The short version
- 34 rules in 9 groups: the em-dash, "Here's the thing", "It's not X, it's Y", staccato fragments, mic drops, and the rest.
- A score from 0 to 100 as you type. Under 15 reads like a person wrote it.
- Each flag comes with a sentence on why it reads badly and what to do instead.
- It runs in your browser. Your draft isn't sent anywhere to be scored, and no model is asked what it thinks.
- Quotes and code are left alone, and it warns you on the send page but never stops you sending.
Try it on your own list
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